(To find out more about this poem visit: http://www.profoundt.com/pts-fables/2010/9/25/baby-scare.html)
I’m conflicted
Everything that I knew has been shifted
This burden not lifted and I am losing my mind
Incapacitated with these thoughts in my head
I can’t go to bed ….worry has lead
Me down this road, where I feel I’ll explode
And be broken into insignificant pieces
Where my life is mere thesis and used as confetti
Along the Serengeti of someone else’s journey
I am hurting ……….don’t find this disturbing
If you have never reached this point in your life……..
For the plight I endure makes me insecure
And uncertain of what is the befall me
They’re stalling………..
O Lord they’re stalling!
And won’t provide answers
This anticipation menaces like cancer,
And I am the lantern
Who’s oil is about to dwindle
O God,
My God,
Rekindle this fire
Consecrate me with the iron and rod of
Correction, cause I……
Am stressing and guessing on what you have already promised
This wait is the longest
You promised
Oh My God you promised
Me,
This daughter,
And it feels like she’s slipping
Through my fingers like water.
Please let me embark of this harbor,
Of…..
Tranquility
No one else seems to be feeling me
They have compassion but what I am asking
Is for a net of safety.
Don’t let me go crazy
My love for you is amazing and
I will still love you in spite of your decisions
But I ask that this tension be made into
Joy………
Cause……..
You promised
Like Abraham and Isaac, i’m realizing
That this is only a test
But the axe is coming down and I am at my weakest…..
Point.
I have no choice but to trust
You at this climax before the resolution
Confusion …..
Is just fusion of me being conned
Into me thinking I’ve been robbed
Of what you have already promised
And the rest is just me being tarnished
By circumstance
Nothing is just happenstance
So I ask that when you deliver
That I will learn what you were teaching
And stop reaching for my own understanding.
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